“Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.” Mt18.5
When I was working toward my masters, I was required to take a class on conflict management. When Brenda and I do pre and post marriage counseling we always include a session on how to constructively argue. It is assumed that there will be conflict in most relationships from time to time. When Jesus said. “If your brother sins against you,“ he used a grammatical construction that indicated the likelihood that such will happen.
When one person wrongs another, we are encouraged to deal with it discretely but deal with it we must. God has made it abundantly clear in Scripture, that our relationship with others is one of His principle concerns. So important is our relationship with others, that God has explained that it affects our relationship with Him. We cannot harbor hatred or resentment toward someone and have peace with God. We are not to let conflict go unattended nor let the sun settle on anger. No matter how much emotional discomfort it causes, we are to seek peace with others. And for that we must go to them.
Now we might wonder, after being wronged, if it would not be better to just forget the matter. It is true that we should be willing to turn the other cheek and forgive, but this does not mean that we shouldn’t go to our brother. If I lose and my brother wins then my brother has ultimately lost. And, because we are to seek our brothers best interest, we do not want him to lose in any sense. Better that the conflict be resolved than ignored. Sometimes, for me to be at peace with my brother means that I give my brother an opportunity to be at peace with me. 5/10/07 ts
Just me trying to be honest with God.
